Translation, A Reciprocal Process [Interview with Kareem James Abu-Zeid on "Nothing More to Lose" by Najwan Darwish]
It’s always interesting to read a translator’s commentary on his or her translation process. For me personally, hearing how other translators think and work only adds to my personal work and experience, alternately showing me approaches or tactics that don’t work for me and showing me approaches and tactics that I’m not alone in using or obsessing over. The below interview between Liz Kelley and translator Kareem James Abu-Zeid came to us in lieu of a review, as Liz and Kareem are friends as well as colleagues in the world of Arabic literature. I won’t write too much more so as not to steal any thunder from Liz’s own intro to the interview, but one of my favorite parts is Kareem’s thoughts regarding “faithfulness to a text“鈥攚hich, I might add, are backed up by the thoughts and reactions of the author, Najwan Darwish, himself.
The interview also includes a few poems from the collection鈥攁ll translated by Abu-Zeid鈥攆or your reading intrigue. And if you like what you see, make sure to here.
Translation, A Reciprocal Process
Earlier this month I spoke to Kareem James Abu-Zeid, the translator of Nothing More to Lose, a collection of poems by Najwan Darwish published in the New York Review Books poetry series. Darwish is a celebrated and well-renowned poet whose poems have been translated into at least fifteen languages. Trained as a lawyer, Darwish has also worked as an editor, cultural critic, and has been active in arts organizations in Palestine and the Arab world. In addition to translating this book of poetry by Darwish, Abu-Zeid has translated several novels from Arabic, by authors such as Rabee Jaber and Tayel Eltayeb, as well as a poetry collection by Dunya Mikhail.
During our conversation, Kareem shared with me his translation process, which was quite collaborative with the poet. He discussed his implicit rule for translating (鈥淚f it sounds translated, I鈥檝e done it wrong鈥), the way that the back-and-forth of the translation process was productive and beneficial not only for the English poems but even, in some cases, for the Arabic, and why he finds translating poetry more fun than translating prose. We discussed the mechanics of selecting poems and the puzzle of organizing them into a cohesive collection. The book takes its name from its first poem, which is not only beautifully translated here, but also encapsulates the nuance and complexity of the collection as a whole.
Nothing More to Lose
Lay your head on my chest and listen
to the layers of ruins
behind the madrasah of Saladin
hear the houses sliced open
in the village of Lifta
hear the wrecked mill, the lessons and reading
on the mosque鈥檚 ground floor
hear the balcony lights
go out for the very last time
on the heights of Wadi Salib
hear the crowds drag their feet
and hear them returning
hear the bodies as they鈥檙e thrown, listen
to their breathing on the bed
of the Sea of Galilee
listen like a fish
in a lake guarded by an angel
hear the tales of the villagers, embroidered
like kaffiyehs in the poems
hear the singers growing old
hear their ageless voices
hear the women of Nazareth
as they cross the meadow
hear the camel driver
who never stops tormenting me
Hear it
and let us, together, remember
then let us, together forget
all that we have heard
Lay your head on my chest:
I鈥檓 listening to the dirt
I鈥檓 listening to the grass
as it splits through my skin . . .
We lost our heads in love
and have nothing more to lose
Liz Kelley: I鈥檝e heard you say that the translation process with Najwan Darwish was collaborative. Could you describe the translation process for these poems? How involved was he?
Kareem Abu-Zeid: What I usually start with, and I think a lot of translators do this, is trying to understand everything going on in the poem, to get the bare meaning on the page.
That obviously involves asking Najwan a lot of questions, depending on the poem; sometimes it鈥檚 very straightforward. But then, once that first step has been taken, once I feel like I know everything going on in the poem鈥攊t doesn鈥檛 mean I actually do鈥攂ut once I have the impression that I do, I will try to create a poem in English out of it.
In that first stage, I as the translator often go quite free, in order to make it as poetic as possible in English. My main rule in translating, that really, in some ways trumps all other rules, is that if it sounds like it was translated, I鈥檝e done it wrong.
I think that鈥檚 a big problem especially with Arabic, a lot of the stuff sounds translated, and you can tell that the translators are sticking to the word order in the Arabic, the way the expressions are formed in Arabic, even grammatical constructions that don鈥檛 work the same way in English.
So I鈥檇 produce a text that was often quite free, then I鈥檇 send it back to Najwan, and that would usually begin a bit of a back and forth. Maybe he鈥檇 ask me: 鈥淲hy did you translate this like this?鈥 or he鈥檇 say: 鈥淭his is too free鈥 or 鈥淎ctually, this isn鈥檛 what I meant to say here, you鈥檝e gotten this wrong.鈥 Through that back and forth, eventually we鈥檇 come to something we were both really happy with.
I鈥檓 lucky with Najwan in that he鈥檚 done some translating himself, and for him the main thing is not mirroring every word of the Arabic in English. For him, the main concern is for it to be poetry in English. If that means that a little bit of the literal meaning of the Arabic is sacrificed, then that鈥檚 what happens.
Also, I think his poetry allows for a certain freedom within the translation, which is really nice. There鈥檚 a lot of room for it. There are some poets who are bit more direct. With Najwan, his poetry lent itself quite well to that type of process.
LK: Do you have any examples of what that process, the back and forth, looks like? Any particular poems from this collection?
KAZ: This is hard because it gets into the nitty-gritty stuff of language. What tends to happen in the back and forth is that my translation winds up getting closer to the Arabic, usually.
One other thing, with regard to collaboration: Najwan usually doesn鈥檛 publish his poems in books in Arabic. He鈥檚 had a couple books come out, but he often publishes in magazines, journals and stuff, and a lot of the poems that made it into this book were fairly recent ones. One of the cool things about translating him is that I feel like his poetry seems to get better over time. Some of his poems from 10 or 15 years ago, when he was just starting to write, were a bit more direct, and even a bit angrier. The newer ones, I find to be much more powerful and more interesting.
I was translating texts that he hadn鈥檛 really published yet in Arabic even. Or if he had it was in journals, not in book form. One tends to think of the poem as fixed when it is in a book. Occasionally, through our work, he would change the Arabic. It didn鈥檛 happen all that often, but it happened in a few instances, where the Arabic would be changed slightly after the back and forth about the English translation. So that was kind of neat to see that, too.
In that respect, there is a lack of editing that happens in the Arabic speaking world. It鈥檚 much more pronounced with novels, you get a lot of novels that have this potential to be something amazing, and they turn into something mediocre or good, but not amazing, because no editor in the English sense of the word has been there to say: this part is weak, cut this 40 pages, etc., etc.
That鈥檚 been good in that with some of the poems, the translation process almost worked as an editing process as well. That was with a few of them, not too many. It was satisfying to me because I see, much more with novels than with poetry, I see the great potential that has been wasted. Even with some of the best novelists of the Arabic-speaking world, I think if they had an editor go through this, someone who does this professionally, you could have had something amazing. You could really be at 100% in terms of quality鈥攚hatever that means鈥攁nd instead you鈥檙e left with 70%.
LK: I find that process to be super fascinating, for translation to be a reflective reading process, to provide that growth for the original and translation. Could you say a few more words about that?
KAZ: Najwan, of all the Arab writers I鈥檝e translated, is the one least in need of an editor, he knows how to do it himself, because he鈥檚 an editor himself. With him, much less so than any of the other projects I鈥檝e worked on, he doesn鈥檛 actually need it. But, what鈥檚 great is that because he鈥檚 an editor, he鈥檚 open to it if something comes up. He鈥檒l even give me a text, and say, 鈥淚鈥檓 not sure about this one,鈥 or 鈥淚鈥檓 not sure this one really works.鈥 Occasionally, you have the texts that work great in Arabic, and I can鈥檛 get them to go in English.
Since this was a selected poems collection, there was an advantage there in that I could let go of those texts. They didn鈥檛 have to go in the book if they didn鈥檛 work.
LK: Could you tell me a bit more about the genesis of this collection? How did you choose the poems?
KAZ: I鈥檇 been translating Najwan鈥檚 stuff for several years: first for a poetry festival in San Francisco, then for a literary festival in Holland, just here and there, then for a couple journals once we had a relationship. Then, I read some of the poems at a literary translator鈥檚 residency in Banff where we did a couple of informal reading nights. I wasn鈥檛 working on this project there; I was working on a novel by Rabee Jaber. But, we did a few informal reading nights where we were supposed to read whatever we wanted, not necessarily what we were working on there. And I read some poems of Najwan鈥檚 that I had translated. One of the editors of NYRB (Jeffrey Yang) was there, because he鈥檚 also a poet and some of his poetry was being translated into German. So he was there and he said, 鈥淲e鈥檝e got this poetry series that we鈥檙e doing, I think this would be good for the series.鈥 I was excited about that prospect because I am trying not to translate, or translate less, for specialized presses that work just on Arabic.
NYRB have only had a few books come out with this series, major European poets, an Indian poet, all in translation and very high quality. I think the last one that came out before Najwan鈥檚 was by Pierre Riverdy, and it was a big collection of poems by him. So that鈥檚 where the idea for a selected poems collection came out. Even though the book is not called 鈥淪elected Poems,鈥 that鈥檚 what it is. Many books in the series are selected poems and don鈥檛 have a title, just the name of the poet. We decided to give this one a title because we thought 鈥淣othing more to lose鈥 kind of encapsulated the collection. That was actually a poem that Najwan wrote after much of the book was done, and then that one came and we were like 鈥淥h, we have a title for the book now.鈥
LK: Tell me a bit more about 鈥淣othing More to Lose鈥? Was it a new poem? How did you choose it as the title?
KAZ: It鈥檚 funny because I think sometimes Najwan doesn鈥檛 even know which of his poems are stronger and weaker. As soon as I read it, I knew it would be very close to the beginning of the book, if not the first poem. And then we wound up making it the title poem! When Najwan and I talked about having a title for the book鈥攄id we even want a title for the book?鈥 鈥淣othing More to Lose鈥 was the only one that really stuck. We threw a couple things out, but there wasn鈥檛 really even another candidate. It was either that or there wasn鈥檛 going to be a title for the book.
That was one of my favorites, because with 鈥淣othing More to Lose,鈥 you think it鈥檚 a collection all about loss, which makes sense in the Palestinian context, and that鈥檚 true. But then when you actually read that poem, the end is very different and it鈥檚 a little big ambiguous. The end is this, almost a moment of love. So that was another reason I liked that as the title poem, because you think it鈥檚 going to be one thing and then when you actually read the poem, it鈥檚 more complex than that. . . .
I have to say, it was fun. I鈥檇 never done a selected poems collection before. Getting to order the poems was fun. It was something I鈥檇 never done before. How do you order poems in a collection? What makes sense? What doesn鈥檛?
LK: Was this a conversation you had with Najwan?
KAZ: The ordering of them? No, Najwan, chimed in after I had established the order, and then I shifted a few things around. I guess it was a conversation I had with him, but only after I had come up with a preliminary order. Then we did this back and forth thing that was almost like working on a translation.
I tried to vary it up. It was actually kind of fun: the whole book was printed out, and I laid them out on the floor of my house. I could see all the poems together, and kept shuffling them around. It was kind of like a puzzle. I tried to keep it varied. And I wanted to frontload, at least the first 15-20 pages to be what I considered the strongest in the collection. And then of course you want to end with a very strong poem, and that sort of stuff. There are certain themes and motifs that recur. I almost categorized the poems according to those themes, and then for the most part made sure I didn鈥檛 have five poems right after another all dealing with, for instance, the Christ image. Or some of his earlier poems are more about resistance in a literal, military sense, and I didn鈥檛 want all of those to be together, either. It didn鈥檛 really make sense doing it chronologically, because I thought most of his stronger poems were more recent ones, from 2007/2008 on. I didn鈥檛 want all the prose poems together either. There鈥檙e a few prose poems in that book, and some of them are quite long. It was just kind of keeping the variety in there.
LK: You mentioned that in some cases, the back and forth resulted in a change to the Arabic? Can you give an example of that?
KAZ: In the first poem, there was something that we changed in the second to last stanza, 鈥淟ay your head on my chest鈥 was the same 鈥淚鈥檓 listening to the dirt / I鈥檓 listening to the grass / as it splits through my skin鈥 I don鈥檛 remember exactly what it was in the Arabic, but I know those two lines changed. All the changes were minor. It wasn鈥檛 like rewriting the whole poem; but that image was slightly better or slightly more powerful this way. There was grass involved, but it wasn鈥檛 splitting through the skin, it was doing something else. But it was interesting because when I translated, that was the image I saw, grass coming up through this corpse, so I put it there. It was an unintentional effect of the Arabic, and then Najwan decided to make the unintentional effect slightly more intentional. I kind of saw the potential in the Arabic and brought it out in the English, and he said 鈥淥h, ok, that wasn鈥檛 quite what I meant, but let鈥檚 keep that鈥 and then he made some slight modification to bring out that part of the image a bit more clearly. So in a way it might have been a misreading of the Arabic.
LK: But a rich and rewarding misreading! . . . Are there poems that you鈥檙e particularly proud of? That you think were particularly strong, or particularly clever, fun to translate?
KAZ: I front-loaded the ones that were my favorites, for the most parts, some are scattered around the rest of the book. The first 15 or 20 were my favorites. I really love 鈥淛erusalem II,鈥 it begins: 鈥淲hen I leave you I turn to stone, /and when I come back to you I turn to stone.鈥 I really liked that a lot. I鈥檓 proud of that one because it stayed fairly close to the Arabic, and more than many of my other translations, there was a very clear rhythm in the Arabic and I captured a very close equivalent to that rhythm in the English. And that doesn鈥檛 often happen in English. The Arabic was almost iambic at times, and I was able to keep that. The lines in that one鈥攗sually I鈥檒l gravitate toward shorter lines鈥攂ut in that one I kept the longer lines.
It kind of went against many of the things I usually do when translating, such as shorten lines. But Arabic is a very compact language, in many ways, and English will most of the time need more words. This means that the English translations very often have more lines than the Arabic. With Najwan, that鈥檚 not always the case, but it is often the case. With other poets even more so. . . .
I have to say I was also really happy with the first one, 鈥淣othing More to Lose,鈥 partly because you don鈥檛 really need the notes. Obviously there are notes in the back that explain specific references, so in that one there鈥檚 Wadi Salib, there鈥檚 madrasah of Saladin, there鈥檚 the village of Lifta, which are all very specific references. The village of Lifta is a weird case where a whole village was, for whatever reason, left standing. They didn鈥檛 raze it. And yet nobody can live there. It鈥檚 a very, very specific reference that for a Palestinian has a very clear resonance, it might be the only example of something like that happening in the Arab world. And then you have Wadi Salib, where you have a similar thing; it鈥檚 a neighborhood in Haifa, where again the Israelis for whatever reason didn鈥檛 destroy these houses, they cemented them shut. So you have these weird cement boxes just standing there, almost as a memorial.
There鈥檙e notes in the back about all this, but what I liked about 鈥淣othing More to Lose,鈥 is that I think it still works in English even without those references. The context of the poem tells you about those even if you don鈥檛 see the notes. And that鈥檚 rare where you don鈥檛 need the references. You don鈥檛 trip over it in English. So I was really happy with that one because that鈥檚 one of the really hard things about Najwan鈥檚 book in particular is that there鈥檚 a lot of very specific references, and that鈥檚 why we put the notes in the back. And yet I think even the references that are specific to Arab culture, those poems still work without the reader necessarily knowing what that reference is. All of those cases made me happy, but I think it worked particularly well with the title poem.
LK: Its interesting to hear you talk about 鈥淛erusalem II,鈥 that one of the things that鈥檚 strong and successful about it is that it sticks close to the Arabic and recaptures the rhythm of the Arabic and the number of lines is at parity with the English. But your earlier comments were about a 鈥渇reer鈥 or looser translation style about sounding poetic in English.
KAZ: I don鈥檛 want to go free, but usually, literal translation sounds really, really bad. The last two months, in my work as I freelance editor, I鈥檝e done two projects where I鈥檝e edited a translation that someone has done from the Arabic, but the whole thing, I鈥檓 not even really looking at the Arabic, it鈥檚 just turning a very literal translation into something that reads a bit better in English. It鈥檚 very rare that you can stick that close and keep it sounding poetic and fluid and not sound like a translated text, where you don鈥檛 get the sense that 鈥渙h, this doesn鈥檛 sound quite right.鈥 There鈥檚 a lot of that, in my opinion, in Arabic novels translated into English, and a lot of the poetry. The few big anthologies that have come out, they鈥檙e great for academics, they mirror the Arabic lines, but they don鈥檛 read poetically. But they鈥檙e at university presses. In my opinion, most of them are not poetry in English. The academic project is wonderful and great, but if that鈥檚 how we translate Arabic into English, then the only people who are going to read these translations are people who are already interested in the Arabic-speaking world, or are academics. I鈥檓 trying to break that mold a little bit as a translator, in whatever way I can.
It鈥檚 a disservice to the original poetry. People are trying to stay close and be faithful, but I think you end up with these unreadable, or very flat translations that aren鈥檛 poetic, where the Arabic was poetic. Poetry is a set of effects, in addition to meaning. It irks me a lot when I see these amazing poets who just get flattened out in English, and it鈥檚 usually by accident. It comes from a good place, that鈥檚 the thing. The desire is to be faithful to the text, to keep the line breaks the same. But the conventions are totally different in Arabic poetry and English, even in the modern era, so you can鈥檛 do that. I don鈥檛 think it is possible to keep it the same and have it be an accurate translation.
LK: How do you deal with rhythm and meter?
KAZ: As close as I can keep it to the Arabic, I do. But the problem is you often can鈥檛. This [Jerusalem II] was a very rhythmic poem by Najwan. Not all of his poems have that rhythm. In terms of rhythm, there鈥檚 almost a set meter in this one, which he usually doesn鈥檛 do. . . . In general in translation, rhythm is one of the hardest things to carry over. When you do carry it over, it鈥檚 usually not the same rhythm that was in the original. It usually can鈥檛 be because meter works very differently in Arabic than in English.
But 鈥淛erusalem II,鈥 reading it out loud, that one in particular works. It was lucky because it was one of the earlier poems I translated by him, and I had a chance to read it at a few different places in English and Arabic. That process helped me tweak the translation for the book. Reading it out loud in Arabic and then in English and really helped. That鈥檚 not all that often the case, when I think about some of the other poems. That鈥檚 a poem that, more than others, is meant to be read out loud, rather than a text to be read. Maybe that鈥檚 why the cadence was so important there. All poetry is written to be read out loud, but there鈥檚 a difference between 鈥淛erusalem II,鈥 and then say, there鈥檚 a short poem called 鈥淚n praise of the Family.鈥 You don鈥檛 need to read that one aloud. Whereas some of them, you do. I think also, that one has a lot of repetition, and the repetition, the sonority is very powerful when it鈥檚 read out loud.
LK: I really enjoyed reading the collection, and it has been wonderful hearing about the process of translating and putting together this collection. Any last thoughts?
KAZ: I think it鈥檚 the best thing I鈥檝e ever done, so far. When I started translating Arabic literature, it was with poetry. I switched to prose and this reminded me how fun it is to do poetry. Especially since I have no real professional reason to translate. Doing novels isn鈥檛 paying the bills; it鈥檚 something I just do for the joy of it. But this, I think I鈥檒l do more poetry now. This was a fun one to translate, where I really loved to translate it. It鈥檚 more fun to translate poetry than prose.
LK: Why is that? Why is it more fun to translate poetry?
KAZ: You can be a bit freer鈥攏o, why is it more fun to translate? I feel like with poetry you can . . . I spend longer on each word. I spend a lot more time per word on poetry than in a novel. You can鈥檛 pore over a novel in quite the same way you can with a book of poetry. And I do feel that translating poetry, there鈥檚 a little bit more room for 鈥渇reedom鈥 in the translation process. The emphasis is at least as much on sound and rhythm as it is on meaning. It鈥檚 not that that isn鈥檛 there in novels, but the balance of power is a little bit more on meaning in a novel. Very concrete and specific things are happening and those things need to be conveyed, relatively accurately, so that the reader isn鈥檛 confused, or else the novel is no longer effective. It鈥檚 more just about that balance of where the energy is going.
Jerusalem (II)
When I leave you I turn to stone
and when I come back I turn to stone
I name you Medusa
I name you the older sister of Sodom and Gomorrah
you the baptismal basin that burned Rome
The murdered hum their poems on the hills
and the rebels reproach the tellers of their stories
while I leave the sea behind and come back
to you, come back
by this small river that flows in your despair
I hear the reciters of the Quran and the shrouders of corpses
I hear the dust of the condolers
I am not yet thirty, but you buried me, time and again
and each time, for your sake
I emerge from the earth
So let those who sing your praises go to hell
those who sell souvenirs of your pain
all those who are standing with me, now, in the picture
I name you Medusa
I name you the older sister of Sodom and Gomorrah
you the baptismal basin that still burns
When I leave you I turn to stone
When I come back I turn to stone
Sleeping in Gaza
Fado, I鈥檒l sleep like people do
when shells are falling
and the sky is torn like living flesh
I鈥檒l dream, then, like people do
when shells are falling:
I鈥檒l dream of betrayals
I鈥檒l wake at noon and ask the radio
the questions people ask of it:
Is the shelling over?
How many were killed?
But my tragedy, Fado,
is that there are two types of people:
those who cast their suffering and sins into the streets so they can sleep
and those who collect the people鈥檚 suffering and sins
mold them into crosses, and parade them
through the streets of Babylon and Gaza and Beirut
all the while crying
Are there any more to come?
Are there any more to come?
Two years ago I walked through the streets
of Dahieh, in southern Beirut
and dragged a cross
as large as the wrecked buildings
But who today will lift a cross
from the back of a weary man in Jerusalem?
The earth is three nails
and mercy a hammer:
Strike, Lord
Strike with the planes
Are there any more to come?
December 2008
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Liz Kelley has a PhD in Anthropology from the University of California Berkeley, with a concentration in linguistic anthropology and translation studies. Her interest and studies specialize in Arabic literatures.
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